Daybook: Sunday, November 23, 2014

Outside my window... We got boat loads of much needed rain yesterday.  I am so thankful.  I am also thankful that my familiar southern weather is back after that polar vortex and today will be a high of 80!  

I am thinking... About a fast I occasionally take on.  It's not a fast of food.  It is a fast of giving my opinion unless it is asked for.  It is a fast from being critical of others.  I learned about it many years ago in a book called A Closer Walk by Catherine Marshall.  I put myself through this every now and then because often when I have come into contact with very critical people, I find myself being critical as well.  In a book called The Power of a Positive Wife, Karol Ladd delineates what a critical spirit does to you:  
1.  A critical spirit focuses on ourselves and makes us unhappy.  We lose perspective and humor.  
2.  A critical spirit blocks the positive, creative thoughts [Yehovah] longs to give us.  
3.  A critical spirit can prevent good relationships between individuals and often produces retaliatory criticalness.  
4.  Criticalness blocks the work of the Spirit of [Yehovah]:  love, good will, and mercy.  
5.  Whenever we see something genuinely wrong in another person's behavior, rather than criticize him or her directly, or -- far worse -- gripe about him behind his back, we should ask the Spirit of [Yehovah] to do the correction needed.  

Matthew  6:5-6:  And when you pray, you shall not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the congregations and on the corners of the streets, to be seen by men. Truly, I say to you, they have their reward.  But you, when you pray, go into your room, and having shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place. And your Father who sees in secret shall reward you openly. 

I am wearing... Yoga pants and a shirt from my daughter's Alma mater.  

I am creating... I wasn't able to get to knitting club on Friday.  I have been knitting while watching TV.  This week, I need to piece together the mitered squares that I've done so I can get more of a vision of a finished product.  I really need to be finished with this.  

I am going... To try and get some more exercise this week.  I have noticed some weight gain and a feeling of sluggishness.  

I am wondering... Why Abraham would twice deny that Sarah was his wife, saying that she was his sister?  Why did he not recognized that if it wouldn't work the first time, it wouldn't work the second time?  What does it take for us to become mature believers?  How many times am I going to try to fall back on the same habit, the same scheme, the same coping mechanisms and defense mechanisms before I finally say.  "Enough already.  Grow up."?    

I am reading... I have read 21% of The Impeachment of Abraham Lincoln.  I usually read before bed, but lately I have been kind of tired.  

I am hoping... to reach a minimum of 1000 lines per day on my employed job, and then have at least a couple of hours available to work on my IC position.  

I am looking forward to... Mishpacha Meal next Shabbat.  I'm sad some of our friends and family that are usually with us won't be here.  We no longer have our Thanksgiving Dinner on Thursdays.  We just tie it in with Shabbat.  

I am learning... Someone came up with an interactive website for the 613 positive and negative commandments in the Torah.  I hope that those of you who are still believing the deception that ALL the law was done away with (when Romans 8:2 specifically says, "For The Law of The Spirit of Life which is in Yeshua The Messiah has freed you from the law of sin and of death.") and all of Psalm 119 extols the praises of the perfect law that YHVH gave and that gives life and peace (abundant life) to all who put it into practice, would look at how this is organized and recognize it as the constitution of the Kingdom of Heaven for all its citizens.  

Mark 12:28-34

"One of the Torah-teachers came up and heard them engaged in this discussion. Seeing that Yeshua answered them well, he asked him, “Which is the most important mitzvah of them all?”  Yeshua answered, “The most important is:  ‘Sh’ma Yisra’el, Adonai Eloheinu, Adonai echad [Hear, O Isra’el, the Lord our God, the Lord is one], and you are to love Adonai your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your understanding and with all your strength.’  The second is this:  ‘You are to love your neighbor as yourself.’  There is no other mitzvah greater than these.”  The Torah-teacher said to him, “Well said, Rabbi; you speak the truth when you say that he is one, and that there is no other besides him; and that loving him with all one’s heart, understanding and strength, and loving one’s neighbor as oneself, mean more than all the burnt offerings and sacrifices.”  When Yeshua saw that he responded sensibly, he said to him, “You are not far from the Kingdom of God.” And after that, no one dared put to him another sh’eilah."   

In another account of the same passage in Matthew, Yeshua says at the end of the discourse in Matthew 22:40, "All of the Torah and the Prophets are dependent on these two mitzvot.”

The 10 Commandments are an index of the 613!  

Galatians 5:13-15 ISR98 - "For you, brothers, have been called to freedom, only do not use freedom as an occasion for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the entire Torah is completed in one word, in this, “You shall love your neighbour as yourself.” And if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another!

One of my favorite things... So last week, when My Diva came home to visit, she told us about a personality test they had her take in grad school.  We spent the evening identifying one another and laughing at ourselves so hard I almost choked on my dinner.  Not good, but the rest was great.  Here is a 5-minute version of the test.  

Friend Hubby and My Diva are both Lions.  Here is the description of a Lion:  

Lion- This personality likes to lead. The Lion is good at making decisions and is very goal-oriented. 
They enjoy challenges, difficult assignments, and opportunity for advancement. Because Lions are 
thinking of the goal, they can step on people to reach it. Lions can be very aggressive and competitive. Lions must learn not to be too bossy or to take charge in other's affairs.
Strength: Goal-oriented, strong, direct
Weakness: Argumentative, too dictatorial
Limitation: Doesn't understand that directness can hurt others, hard time expressing grace 

Princess Butterfly and I are both Otters.  Here is the description of an Otter:
Otter- Otters are very social creature. Otter personalities love people. They enjoys being popular and 
influencing and motivating others. Otter can sometimes be hurt when people do not like them. Otter 
personalities usually have lots of friends, but not deep relationships. They love to goof-off. (They are 
notorious for messy rooms.) Otters like to hurry and finish jobs. (Jobs are not often done well.) The 
otter personality is like Tigger in Winnie The Pooh.
Strength: People person, open, positive
Weakness: Talks too much, too permissive
Limitation: Remembering past commitments, follow through with discipline 

Boy Wonder is an amalgamation, but I think he's mostly a Beaver.  Here is the description of a Beaver:  
Beaver- Organized. Beavers think that there is a right way to do everything and they want to do it exact that way. Beaver personalities are very creative. They desire to solve everything. Desire to take their time and do it right. Beavers do not like sudden changes. They need reassurance.
Strength: High standards, order, respect
Weakness: Unrealistic expectations of self & others, too perfect.
Limitation: Seeing the optimistic side of things, expressing flexibility 

None of us is a Golden Retriever (although Princess Butterfly and I definitely have some Golden Retriever traits) but here is the description of one:  
Golden Retriever- Good at making friends. Very loyal. Retriever personalities do not like big changes. They look for security.  Can be very sensitive. Very caring. Has deep relationships, but usually only a couple of close friends. Wants to be loved by everyone. Looks for appreciation. Works best in a limited situation with a steady work pattern.
Strength: Accommodating, calm, affirming
Weakness: Indecisive, indifferent, unable to express emotional, too soft on other people
Limitation: Seeing the need to be more assertive, holding others accountable.  

Now this is a constant source of conversation around here.  Boy Wonder has a new job and has a manager who is a Beaver too.  He can't stand it!  I tease him about ending up with an Otter as a wife and he groans.  I remind him that his father doesn't have a problem having an Otter as a wife.  I was listening to a Christian psychologist talk about how the different personalities relate to one another.  She said an Otter can say to a Golden Retriever, "We should be able to fly through the air like birds!"  The Golden Retriever will encourage the Otter and Voila!  The airplane is born.  That makes total since to me since one of my closest friends is a Golden Retriever and is always my biggest cheerleader.  I think my son will need a Golden Retriever wife.      

The Smalley Institute identifies characteristics of a Lion-Otter marriage.  Very interesting stuff.     

KEY STRENGTHS

A Lion married to a Otter can be a truly fun dynamic for a marriage.
Lots of energy
Go for broke kind of marriage and attitude toward life
You can conquer the world

You’ve got lots of energy both on the fun-side of life (from the Otter) and on the accomplishment-side of life (from the Lion). The two of you can utilize each other’s go-for-broke attitude to accomplish things both in your marriage, with your kids, and in your community.

The two of you together can truly conquer the world. You can be fearless and comfortable with taking risks because you are both on the risk-side of the personality scale.

KEY CONFLICTS
Neither are very good at listening
Otters don’t want to be controlled (ROTFLOL!!!!)  
Feel out of control for the Lion
Otter won’t respond to harshness

The areas where you will want to watch out for is in how you communicate with each other. Unfortunately, neither of you are the best listeners. If you remember your individual personality profiles, you can both be one-way listeners. The Lion…because you are focused on solutions or building your own argument. The Otter…because you are simply distracted or bored with the conversation.

You two need to be more deliberate about listening to each other and not getting caught up in trying to change who your spouse is. The Lion is going to want to say, “Be more reliable” and the Otter is going to say, “But you married me…for me!” Your two personality styles are different enough, you are going to struggle trying to change each other to be more like yourself. This is not going to send a message of unity or understanding.

To the Lion, remember that your Otter spouse is not going to respond to harshness or criticism like you do. Be positive and high energy when dealing with your Otter. To the Otter, try and take it easy with all the unfocused energy. Your Lion spouse likes change, but change that is purposeful and strategic.

THINGS TO FOCUS ON
Know your buttons
Learn to validate
Set good boundaries with each other 

(I think in 27+ years of marriage, without ever knowing about this test, these are things we have always worked on.)  

From the learning rooms... 

Bible:  In the study guide that we use for Bible, this passage came up and it was a great opportunity to discuss something that I learned about a long time ago in greater detail.  The study guide says:  

“Then Jacob said, ‘Swear to me as of this day.’ So he swore to him, and sold his birthright to 
Jacob. And Jacob gave Esau bread and stew of lentils; then he ate and drank arose, and went 
his way. Thus Esau despised his birthright” (Genesis 25:31–34). 

When Scripture mentions bread and drink it alludes to a covenantal passing, an agreement or 
sealing is taking place.  Esau didn't just give his birthright to Jacob, he sealed it with a covenantal meal.   

This brings to light the passage of Scripture in the Renewed Covenant (New Testament) that says:  
"In my earlier letter I wrote you not to associate with people who engage in sexual immorality.  I didn’t mean the sexually immoral people outside your community, or the greedy, or the thieves or the idol-worshippers — for then you would have to leave the world altogether!  No, what I wrote you was not to associate with anyone who is supposedly a brother but who also engages in sexual immorality, is greedy, worships idols, is abusive, gets drunk or steals. With such a person you shouldn’t even eat!

Meals are never just meals.  They are covenant ceremonies!  This is why the enemy wants to destroy family dinners.  If a family doesn't eat together, they are not bound together.  You would think that this is not such a big deal, but it really is.  This is why holidays (biblical and nonbiblical) revolve around feasting.  Eating together!  

As the verse above tells us, be careful who you eat with!  

Psalm 41:9 "Even my own familiar friend, in whom I trusted (relied on and was confident), who ate of my bread, has lifted up his heel against me."

Matthew 26:23, "He replied, He who has [just] dipped his hand in the same dish with Me will betray Me!"
  

Noticing that... Sometimes when something is beyond our knowledge or area of expertise, we dismiss it as unreal or unnecessary.      

From the kitchen... This was actually a recipe from last week that I forgot to include.  It's definitely a keeper.  
Baked Chicken and Mushroom Skillet 
My daughter wasn't feeling well on Friday, so I started the challah while she took a nap.  I couldn't find her recipe so I used this one.  It used much more yeast and salt than my daughter's recipe.  
Bistro Challah Bread Recipe.  
For Erev Shabbat, I made The Best Crockpot Chicken Noodle Soup.  
For Shabbat, I made Baked Ziti, and since it was Friend Hubby's birthday, I made a lemon Bundt cake from scratch.  

Around the house... I only did 3/4 of the time I was supposed to do on my focused room this week, but will definitely be doing my "company is coming" cleaning this week.  

   

Honor where honor is due:  http://thesimplewomansdaybook.blogspot.com/